A Public Service Announcement

May 30, 2007 at 7:22 pm (matrimonial genius)

Colgate, it comes with a flip top lid.

Now I’m not suggesting this is more or less annoying to any specific householder – but it may be useful information, nonetheless.

Put your makes of toothpaste with a flip lid in the comment box. You Know it Makes Sense.

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How to pack for holidays

May 27, 2007 at 7:20 pm (matrimonial genius)

Him – biscuits, preferrably digestives, socks

Me – everything else, socks,

Socks, in case The Doctor decides to tell the story of how on one of our first holidays I didn’t pack socks so like a gentleman he lent me his. So when we ran out of socks half way through the holiday and found ourselves with one clean dry pair, and one clean wet pair, he took me at my word when I said put the wet ones in the microwave.

Oops.

Damn that holiday spirit…

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observed after a routine health test….

May 24, 2007 at 9:17 pm (healthcare unprofessionals)

Me – My GOODNESS those people are annoying. Could they have been less professional? Why didn’t they believe me when I told them how I wanted to transfer? why couldn’t they answer a simple question? Weren’t they PATRONISING?

Him – Patronising?

Me (at considerably higher pitch) – Yes! Patronising!

Him – I don’t think they were patronising you. After all, they weren’t even talking to you….

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how to make a green thai curry

May 14, 2007 at 5:05 pm (uncookery)

Get home from work. Be tired, and on the verge of grumping. (No real reason) Feel relief that you do at least have a Good Idea for dinner.

Green thai fish curry.

Chop mushrooms, pak choi and fish. Worry slightly that fish is not ethical. Check fishonline.org Discover is OK. Feel relieved and rinse sugar snap peas. Soak rice.

Ask PA to get coconut milk and green thai curry paste from cupboard.

Discover no thai curry paste.

Disbelieve PA (in a friendly sort of way) Go through cupboard. Go through fridge. Weep pathetically.

Revisit cupboard. Find Tom Yum paste. Decide to ignore the significant quantities of msg.

Find wok. Heat wok. Add tom yum paste. Start to cook rice.

Add stock.

Reach for coconut milk.

Discover no tin opener.

Discover The Doctor’s whisky box.

Feel better. Find coconut cream, add that, add 2tsp fish sauce, and 1 tbs lime juice.

Simmer for 5 minutes, add fish and mushrooms.

Simmer for 10 minutes, add pak choi and sugar snap peas.

Simmer for 5 minutes. Pronounce ready. Discover rice not cooked.

Swear vigourously.

*    *    *    *    *    *

But after all that, actually, it was mighty tasty.  Even the MSG. I may make it again – without the stock and with considerably less chaos. Of course, if you want a *real* recipe this might suit.

ps no idea if tom yum paste is veggie off hand – suspect it is. Would be yum with cubes of tofu and soy sauce instead of the fish sauce.

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at our own artistic angle

May 11, 2007 at 9:39 pm (muppetry within)

So, we’re at home, feet are up, shoes are off, tea is in hand. The playstation is humming unbelievably loudly in the background and we are watching ‘A Cock and Bull Story‘ at significant volume as sent by Lovefilm as we both think the other one likes Steve Coogan.

Its a fine film. A tad up its own bottom in a convoluted in joke kind of way. Somewhat self referential, but its OK, I like that sort of a thing. The playstation controller gets dropped, various words and numbers pop up on the screen, and it goes back to normal, or so we think. The film is of the making of a film, of the film, and is shot a little like a documentary, so when the odd extra bit of voice over begins it seems predictable, almost to be expected.

And what’s NOT expected is that at the end of the film the voice will say ‘Audio Description Track provided by XYZ’

So, ‘A Cock and Bull Story‘. The sort of film you can watch half of with the audio description track running. And not notice.

We’re watching ‘The Bourne Supremacy‘ tonight.

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the name of the game…

May 7, 2007 at 5:35 pm (muppetry at large)

When naming a house, there are many issues to bear in mind. Will it be corny? Will it make sense? Will it be a sign of pride for future generations?

Clearly none of these things were taken into account for a pretty seaside bungalow I saw in the south west recently. Its name caused me to do a double take of the Carry On film variety.

Cockrock

Seriously. In swirly writing. On a rock.

Beat that.

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Is it just me?

May 4, 2007 at 3:37 pm (uncookery)

To look at me, you can’t tell. In many other areas of my life; I’m completely normal. I look just like you. I only have a small number of embarrassing CDs’ and I never talk about them in public. I work hard – ish, and my antisocial hobbies are limited to knitting shapeless items out of beautiful wool. Its alright – I don’t give them as presents and I rarely wear them. You can even ask me not to. I won’t mind.

What I can’t do is make a cheese sauce. Or a white sauce. Or anything involving the cooking flour and butter together shenanigans.

I can do tomato sauce. I even almost made a mushroom cream sauce the other day.

By accident, that is. I meant to make a topping for something. I understand the theory – melt butter, stir in flour, then add milk, continue to stir til it thickens, add cheese if needed, but it never works. I have killed 3 saucepans. I nearly cause an entire hall of residence to evacuate.

Twice.

I may be beyond help. Please stay here and look after me.

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